2010-01-30

Racing Tomorrow and the Best of the Aughts

Seems that I am ready to race, or at least try. Last weekend didn't happen as the course is very dangerous and my surgeon wouldn't like to hear that I crashed. So tomorrow I'll drive out to Fremont and surf the rear of the pack at the Early Bird Road Race.

In many respects I am glad the last decade is over. I spent 8 years of it in college, and one year as a lazy bum/blockbuster employee, and the last a pro...Mechanical Engineer/science project. The decision to go to grad school at SJSU was the smartest decision I have made in my entire life, and one I will never regret. There were things I wish I had done prior to August 2006 which may have altered my course, but I'm glad I didn't and screw up what I have now...hope. Below is a top 10 countdown of my personal best moments of the "Aughts" (2000-2009).

10. Graduating UH-Mechanical Engineering Bachelors degree May 2004: It was quite an achievement, one of persistence/perseverance. Those were some good times and some stressful times. It's not higher because it has minimal impact on my present course other than allowing me to go further later. I didn't have a job lined up unlike most of my friends and basically languished until I sent my papers to SJSU.

9. Waking Up From A Pancreaticoduodenectomy (Nov 5th 2009): When the lights go out for a surgery it never goes black, just everything fades to white.... slowly, and an instant later you open your eyes and the reverse happens. This is instant was 9 hours later, and though the risk of never seeing this world again was only <1%, the chance is always there. My theory is nothing doesn't exist and my 6th surgical procedure of 2009 reasserted my belief.

8. State Criterium Championship 2000 (July 9th 2000): I broke away with about 20 minutes to go in my first top category Criterium Championship race, and never saw the pack again. It was the only race when I had time to celebrate my victory (all my other wins were sprints). If I had any doubt what my passion would be for the rest of this life it was erased in 20 minutes, forever.

7. Olomana Road Race victory (7/25/2004): Just a month earlier in California I had a magor wreck in my first Pro1/2 race, and while coming back in just a week, I DNF'd the Cascade Classic in 20 miles...I basically was questioning why I cared so much about cycling. I flew home skipping out on my desire to race in Superweek. I still couldn't find a job, but cycling is great therapy, and rode my butt back into shape. I raced my typical attack almost every lap style at Olomana, and again destroyed that sprint and won.

6. Job Offer From BAE (March 2008): I got a FEDEX letter at the SJSU dorm mailroom from BAE, after the interview I was skeptical about getting an offer. I was planning on heading to Seattle for another job at the Shipyard in Bremerton. I open the letter and what do you know.... and they are going to pay me how much? And I get to stay here! Sweet. The best thing is I get to use Pro-E....

5.Graduating SJSU Master's of Science Mechanical Engineering (May 2008): Honestly UH was harder for me, but this opened so many doors, and something I never expected. Truthfully, a Master's degree at UH wouldn't have helped much other than a pay raise in an HVAC job...

4. Hawaii's win over SJSU @ Spartan Stadium (October 2007): I sat in the SJSU students section holding my tongue for over 3 hours, but than Colt Brennan ran in that touchdown in overtime and that was it.... I moved not to get killed....then that pass was deflected, and it was pandamonium!!! I was walking around chanting BCS around all the Hawaii fans. That game was the most memorable of that 12-0 Hawaii run to the Sugar Bowl. And I WAS THERE. Hawaii Warrior for life.

3. Winning BAR jersey 2002: I was en fuego in 2002. I won Tantalus (my one and only time), Kalaeloa, Olomana, the State Crit, 2nd at Dick Evans, State RR, Cycle To The Sun, Hard Rock Crit, and raced a bunch in the mainland for the first time. I wasn't the smartest racer back then, and wished I could have bottled that form I had. Because I recall not following Ray when he attacked on Makapuu when I could have easily followed him and dusted him in the sprint, now unfortunately all I have are memories (if they could find a way for use to relive them, it'd be awesome)

2. Haleakala and Dick Evans 2009: On August 17th 2009 I had my 4th ERCP.... and was doubting why I was going to ride up a 36 mile long climb. I flew to Maui anyway and my mom tagged along. The day before I rode up about 9 miles of it, and was feeling okay. My strategy was to follow wheels and not waste energy. Unfortunately I woke up feeling great! And my strategy almost flew out the window after a slow start to the race made me itchy to really race. I settled down and rode the most out of body race of my life. It wasn't until 9000 feet when reality kciked into my Calves and Ray and the annoying Japanese old man rode away. I crossed the line in third grinning ear to ear. 2 weeks later it was dejavu at Dick Evans. I felt awful for much of the race, and had another flat. That's to Mark Little who gave up his wheel I didn't have to expend too much energy. I felt awful all the way through the last feed zone, but then the 7th hammer gel kicked in, and damn... it was on! I couldn't shake 4 other guys and my ever degenerating sprint ability failed me, but I was again grinning ear to ear. All I thought the last 20K was "I can't believe my body is letting me do this!"

1. Dick Evans Memorial Road Race 2007: I finally won that bugger. I remember so many years being in the final group thinking "I'm going to win this!" And choking in the end. This year I made damn sure I'd be in the final group, suffering like I never had (especially after another flat tire....). I remember the pain following Alex Eiler's attack up Makapuu. I remember Alex complaining about me not pulling through with 1K to go. I remember going into that final corner, hesitating for a second and they saying to myself "Go NOW!!" I remember the burning in my legs give way to elation when no one passed me before I hit to finish line. It was over, the monkey was off my back.

2010-01-11

Next Step

The scar has healed, still tight, and can't stand straight. The goods news is I can ride just fine now, with some minor back pain, that's annoying but not crippling.

Today was the first day of the anti-blood doping regime, or one part Gemcitibine and another part Cisplatin. Other than the massive amount of time wasted just getting things taken care of before I get pumped full of that crap, it wasn't bad at all. Just once a week doesn't seem as it's going to be too bad, just work time is going to suffer. Right now I feel fine, no indications of fatigue, but it's only been 8 hours, and was only infusion number 1. Next one is Tuesday, I'll see if I'll be able to race on the 23rd. I may try irregardless. That week 1, I get a break, then it's 2 more the following two weeks, a week off, repeat...

One thing I noticed in SF, aside from the traffic (which is still better than Oahu) is SF has some HOOOTTT ladies just walking around. It's startling. Waiting to be standing up straight again, that hunched look isn't appealing.

2009-12-01

Grab life by the Throat

"When life gets tough, grab it by the throat until it gives you what you want!" Triple H on WWE Raw 11-30-2009.

Well that's what I have to do. I've got a large line on my chest which I realized is kind of like the one Kratos has (sans the muscle definition).

Like Kratos I rose from the depths after the wound was sealed up. And now I have quite a battle ahead of me. Just like Kratos I have to alter the threads of fate to get through this mess.

Fate hasn't smiled upon me, so I have to grab it by the throat until it gives me what I want!

Remember the 5th of November?


I totally forgot November 5th was Guy Fawkes Day. I won't forget again.

2009-11-18

Post Surgery

It's not as horrible as I thought it would be. Not to say it's been a cakewalk. The surgery was 9 hours long, the surgeon found the bile duct was more compromised than originally thought. Nonetheless it went as well as possible for such a thing. The first day was miserable, and moving was painful, felt like my abs were spasming and cramping. Just sat and watched tv while trying not to stress my horribly sore abs. By the 2nd day they wanted me walking around, so I did wasn't too bad. After 4 days I was able to move better and was able to have a Popsicle. The next day I had some soft food with no problem, and the next "regular" food. That made me noxious, but I really think it was just the horrible hospital food that I wouldn't have eaten before the surgery. Then the incision area got tight and I couldn't stand up straight anymore. The back hurt as I hunched over when I walked. Then they took out all my IV's and one drain tube (wish they took out the other one), and kicked me out. It's better at home, the food doesn't make me want to vomit, and I have my PS3. The only thing's annoying me are this drain which nothing is draining into, my tight abdomen (I miss standing up straight), and that I never heard anything from pathology. So I'm still in the dark and probably will be until I can get another appointment, which I hope is soon the drain is pointless and I still have all 30 staples on my gut.

I've already started riding the trainer, mainly because I can't walk around without killing my back. That's about it. Don't feel like really elaborating, as this is boring.

2009-10-28

Just One Week To Go

One more week left until my anatomy is completely altered. I remembered it's not the second time I had something removed. I've had 6 teeth removed to make room in my jaw for my other huge teeth, but that's peanuts compared what's going to happen on November 5th. The past few days I've been riding real hard trying to make a final decent showing at my last "race" (low key's aren't supposed to be races...) of the year. Also trying to be as fit as possible going into this mess, and anticipated 2 month hiatus. Brain freeze. Darn work.

2009-10-17

Anomalous Pancreatico..what?

That's my dilemma. Well it's called an Anomalous Pancreaticobiliary Ductal Junction. Normally during embryonic development the Pancreatic Duct will join to the bile duct right at the Ampulla Vater at the Duodenum. This allows the Pancreatic Juices and Bile to not intermingle before entering the intestinal tract. Somewhere in development of this system a small small portion of people will oddly have the junction created well before (>5 mm) the Ampulla Vater. The will result in a slew of digestion, pancreatic, gall bladder, and bile duct issues. This is because the pancreatic juice is free to back up into the biliary tree (which isn't equipped to handle it).

It's first caught in by those cases that develop choledoctal (spelling) cysts, mostly in young children. It's treated by surgical resection, and a Roux-En-Y (if possible), rarely results in cancer. Then there is the segment of those with an APBDJ who don't develop one of those cysts. They often aren't so fortunate, they often suffer with pancreatitis for years, living in pain when the eat certain things. Then at some point all the irritation to the bile ducts manifests itself in strictures, tumors, and gallbladder problems or CANCER.

I'll get to the point. I don't know if I have cancer but there's a wall thickening mass (14X17 mm) growing in my distal bile duct. I have an APBDJ. It probably should have been found months ago, but the doctors weren't looking for it, their concern was my ductal blockage. With what I have there is a high likelihood of developing cancer. I don't know what the doctor plans, the Roux-En-Y or the Whipple, depends on the "mass."

For the metrically challenged...


Been riding terribly the last two weeks, going to turn that around, stop driving to work... I don't even think I made the top 10% on Tunitas today, just couldn't hold the pace past 15 minutes. Feel great but just blow up, mostly breathing problems, need to do more long threshold intervals, and more than 100 minutes of mid week riding...

I found a spent shell casing on Lobitas Creek Road this morning, careful of those Bay Area rednecks!

2009-11-05

Nov. 5 is D-Day.

Really hoping Nov. 4th isn't my last day at BAE.

Ce que sera sera....

2009-10-10

2009...."Is it over yet?"

2009 Started terrible as I was getting over a cold or something I got in Hawaii. Got worse with a terrible showing at Snelling, then began to turn around when I finished the longest race of my life at the Merco RR. It was up and down 'til the first big race I stayed with the pack the whole time (Sea Otter). Little did I know I was in for a shock in May. After pulling out completely drained at Berkeley (a race I never DNF'd before) I took a look in the mirror and saw the yellow in my eyes. Not a good feeling. A week later I was in hospital dealing with a slew of problems losing 15 pounds, and feeling like my season was over. Had more important things to worry about. I spent over a month sorting things out going in and out of the hospital. At one point my hematocrit was down to 25 due to a cholangitis infection. Finally feeling like I could go again I jumped into a Time Trail, and finished dead last in the P12's but wasn't too far off. Leesville started bad, but by the last hour I knew I could still hammer, and my liver was still working fine. In August I was in the hospital again with a fever of 103, but recovered quick, learned I most likely don't have Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis, and was on a plane to Hawaii. Had an out of body ride up Haleakala, flew back to SJ. Rode great but ran out of water at 105 degree Winters, then was back to Hawaii. I don't remember feeling so good physically in a long time at a Dick Evans but I did.

Now I'm just waiting, and waiting to get word on when my world turns upside down officially. Below are my results for 2009 for what they are worth. I'm still "racing" low key hillclimbs until I get one large abdominal scar....sometime this month.

JAN 1 SAN BRUNO HC 11/13 16:53
FEB 21 SNELLING RR DNF/120 ---
MAR 1 MERCO RR 90/145 4:28 26.4 MPH AVG 118 mi
MAR 21 OROSI RR 5/10
MAR 28 WARDS FERRY RR DNF/26 4/5 LAPS
MAR 29 WARNERVILLE RR 7/14
APR 5 SANTA CRUZ CLASSIC DNF/105
APR 11 COPPEROPOLIS RR DNF/81 4/5 LAPS
APR 17 SEA OTTER RR 43/80
APR 25 WENTE RR 37/75
APR 26 WENTE CRIT 71/100
MAY 3 SONORA RR 6/13
MAY 10 BERKELEY HILLS RR DNF/60
JUN 28 BENICIA TT 9/9
JUL 3 LEESVILLE GAP RR 19/34
JUL 18 WATSONVILLE CRIT 9/19
JUL 19 ALBANY CRIT 39/80 I actually pulled out 1/2 way
AUG 2 TIMPANI CRIT 40/85
AUG 6 SWANTON TT 2/40 OPEN
AUG 9 PATTERSON PASS RR DNF/40 14 FINISHED 3/4 LAPS
AUG 23 CYCLE TO THE SUN 3/180 OPEN
AUG 29 WINTERS RR DNF/50 3/4 LAPS
SEP 6 DICK EVANS RR 3/165 OPEN
SEP 19 HENLEYVILLE RR 21/26
SEP 20 FREMONT PEAK HC 6/9 42:15 14.2 MPH
OCT 3 LOWKEY #1- MONTEBELLO 5/104 OPEN 28:35 11.3 mph
OCT 10 LOWKEY #2-OLH 8/?
OCT 17 LOWKEY #3- TUNITAS ------------------

2009-10-07

2.5 weeks

I get basically 2 1/2 weeks to get everything in order before prototype production begins. The docs are giving the option to wait and see if a major reconstruction is necessary. There will be one last test imaging and ERCP in the coming days before the final "design" will be decided upon.

In the meantime rock on!